Sonntag, 13. Februar 2011

Jesus Christ

I'm a European. I can look back at 3000 Years of documented history. And at millenium of medival, without scientific progression, but instead they burned witches.
Also christianity was used to legitimate kings, wars and so on. Thank god for Kant.
Shit like Jesus makes me Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage!
Love, Dr. Rage

Donnerstag, 10. Februar 2011

Tumbler Bitches

If you've got facebook and more then 10 friends you have at least one person of this kind in you friendslist:
-female
-15-19 (might even be 21)
-Got a 500€ DSLR-Camera
Here's a collection of typical tumbler-bitchesphotomotives:
"A pic of my All-Stars in black and white so people think I am deep."


"Please daddy, please!"

"Oh, this guy is so cute."
Shit like Tumbler-Bitches make me Raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaage!
Love,
Dr. Rage



Mittwoch, 9. Februar 2011

France

La France

In a normal blogpost I first name the thing I hate and then tell you why.
The problem with France is that I actually don't know why  I hate them so much. Maybe it's because of the language's pronunciation that doesn't correspond in any way with a word's writing. Maybe it's because of losing two world wars against those motherfuckers. And maybe it's because of a tragical event that we today refer to as "300M Get".

Vahina Giocante
But since I watched "Inside Ring" ("Ultimate Heist" in the USA), a french thriller with Jean Reno (that was incredibly lame and had no real plot, but on the aesthetic side was pretty good), I know they've got taste in women. If you like her you might want to google-picture-search her.


Anyway,
Shit like france makes me RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!
Love,
Dr. Rage











                                                                                        
                                                                                        

Dienstag, 8. Februar 2011

Music Edition Vol. 1

Music that makes me fucking rage:
Linkin Park:
In the early 90s a genius named Tom Morello and a rebel named Zach De La Rocha formed "Rage Against The Machine", a band that made music that fucking awesome many wanted to be like them.
But since they never had a genius, nor a rebel they sucked. Still some of them got signed by a record company, and the worst of all "Linkin Park" (it was meant to be "Lincoln Park" but they are uneducated losers so nevermind) got most famous.

Caution: This video was listened to by professionals, a non-professionals listening to it might get serious health issues, including vomiting of blood, shit and brain.


Shit like this makes me RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!
Love,
Dr. Rage

Montag, 7. Februar 2011

Romantic Comedies

What's the easiest way to make a movie?
You don't need any creativity, you don't need good actors you don't even need a script that wasn't created by a monkey. You guessed it: Romantic Comedies.
I created this simple scheme to spoiler every romantic comedy you'll ever watch.

Dr. Rages Romantic Comedy Scheme:


Random Guy
Jennifer Aniston


Jennifer Aniston hates Random Guy because he's the type of guy she hates
Random Guy is in love with Jennifer Aniston altough she isn't the type of women he is usually atracted to
Random Guy uses trick to get Jennifer Aniston fall in love with him
They are happy together
Jennifer Aniston finds out about trick and is mad at Random Guyaltough Random Guyy feels bad about having done the trick
Random Guy tries to explain, Jennifer Aniston doesn't want to hear it
Random Guy does something that is incredibly awkward
Jennifer Aniston thinks it's cute and comes back
They are happy together
The End


(I added a picture of Jennifer Aniston's nipples to get you to read it.
Apparently I was succesful, altough Jennifer Aniston is ugly.(Not ugly enough I wouldn't fuck her, but if I would, I'd do it for her cash.))

Shit like Romantic Comedies make me RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!
Love,
Dr. Raaage
                                                                                                                        

Sonntag, 6. Februar 2011

Dr. Rage hates you.

Let me explain to you why.
Imagine you're a Doctor and just chillin on your blog and this random dude comes to your blog and is all like 'Sup, i think you are funny, lol' but you know that this guy isn't actually laughing out loud. Why does he say he is? Because he thinks you will like him if he says he does? Because he thinks you are going to fuck him then? You won't.
Shit like this makes me RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!